My Philosophy

My Philosophy

"In a divided world,

wholeness is revolution"

"In a divided world,

wholeness is revolution"

My Approach

...and why I created Evolutionary Love

Over the years I trained in many different approaches to psychotherapy & relationship transformation, each with its own strengths and its own blind-spots. Evolutionary Love is a wholeness approach to relationships that combines the best of these different schools of thought with the insight I've gained from working with 100s of couples.


Over the years I have trained in many different approaches to psychotherapy & relationship transformation, each with its own strengths and its own blind-spots. Evolutionary Love is a wholeness approach to relationships that combines the best of these different schools of thought with the insight I've gained from working with 100s of couples.


Things that break my heart

  • That our society is so obsessed with new love , youth & beginnings that it totally missed the depth of joy waiting for us in grown-up love, maturity & endings

  • That generational “every day, little t” trauma gets passed on unknowingly resulting in us seeing as “normal” what is actually super fucked up

  • That the primitive parts of our brain - that are SO good at survival but terrible at connection and growth - are encouraged to take the lead in our relationships and we don’t even know they are doing it

  • That the only way we know how to belong is by agreeing on the same people to other

  • That we do the exact same thing internally: cutting off aspects of self in order to belong and thereby sacrificing our wholeness 

  • That on a relational level this results in all sorts of flavours of hell between people who just wanted to love and be loved

  • That on a larger scale this results in divided societies, our civil wars, our hatred and ultimately our failure to protect our planet home 

What I am on this planet to do

  • To continually learn and expand ways of cultivating wholeness on an individual, relational & collective level

  • Hint: wholeness IS belonging that includes difference!

  • To bring compassion to the depth of human suffering, especially in the vulnerable and extremely difficult arena of intimate relationships

  • To always seek the both/and in every polarity, seeking the wisdom that can be integrated from each “side” into a whole that is powerful, inclusive and real

A note on my content and food

  • I believe that “consuming excessive content” is part of the normal that is actually fucked up

  • We all know that overeating is detrimental to our physical health, so let’s face that consuming too much content is detrimental to our mental/emotional/spiritual health

  • Food & content are not just meant to be consumed, they are meant to be digested, they are meant to nourish

  • My favourite meals are shared “tapas” -  a table of little dishes that get passed around, nibbled on, commented on, delighted in…

  • I bear this in mind in everything I create, including these pages

  • If I have left anything unclear by attempting not to overfeed, please do reach out and ask! If you’re hungry and wanting “seconds”, oh my, you are so welcome to have more

  • If you’d like a flavour of my tapas style content, download my choose-your-own adventure short graphic novel below

FREE DOWNLOAD!

Uncover the Secrets to Deeper, More Real Love, Even in Times of Crisis

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Cake macaroon dessert apple pie I love. Cake macaroon fruitcake. Chocolate cake gingerbread jujubes chupa chups.

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